Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Water Park

Things I learned over a weekend at an indoor water park...

- Any three year old who jogs around a lazy river a few dozen times (in one hour) will sleep very well.

- If I am ever the parent who allows the "life guards" to guard my child's life as I sip drinks in the Wet Rooster bar, please send in the firing squad. I have failed as a parent.

- When a life guard has a bigger tire around their middle than I do they WILL NOT move quickly and efficiently when trying to get out of the way of a 200 gallon bucket of water splashing. As much as you do not want to laugh, you might. A few times.

- A one year old who cries and begs to play pool basketball, dunk, and hang on the rim will draw an adoring audience.

- "Balmy 84 degrees" is simply false advertising. Try "Goose Bump-inducing" and you've got it!

- When a life guard throws on a pair of goggles and a snorkel - yes, a snorkel - to fix a drain at the bottle of a 3 foot kids pool, you might stare and then laugh. Again.

- $8.99 personal Pizza Hut pizza's just taste better with a little chorine.

- When your three year old smiles from ear to ear for six hours straight, you'll already be looking for the next weekend you can head back!

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